Sum of the Parts
by xxaishiteru
Summary: SSHG Oneshot. Hermione sees Snape's worst memory, and Severus is convinced that she will never love him as a result. Is this really the case?


**AN: **This is the first one-shot I have ever attempted. It is also the first SSHG fic I have ever written. I almost decided not to do it, but the idea kept nagging at me. I hope you all enjoy this…

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Severus couldn't believe that he had been so stupid. How did he get it into his head that she could ever love him? He should have learned the first time that love was a double-edged sword, that love hurt too much for the small amount of happiness it brought. The first time he had loved had been unbearable. The second time had been excruciating. He vowed to himself that he would never allow himself a third time.

_Although it's fitting that the second time I ever loved would end miserably because she saw what had happened the first time_, he thought.

_Flashback_

_Severus walked up to the stone gargoyle that guarded the entrance to Dumbledore's office._

"_Lemon Drops," he said to the gargoyle._

_It moved aside for him, and he walked up the spiral staircase to the office. He had been expecting to see Dumbledore behind the grand mahogany desk, but instead he saw Potter with _her_. Hermione was bent over the desk looking at something, and he heard the last bits of their conversation before they realized he was there:_

"_Honestly, Hermione, he's disgusting. I don't understand you," Harry said._

_That was when Snape had come to the top of the landing and saw Hermione bent over a Pensieve that showed a young James Potter waving his wand at his younger self, who was instantly hanging upside down with his robes around his ears, his graying underwear showing to the world. Lily, the first girl Severus had ever loved, came to stick up for him, but the word "mudblood" had tumbled out of an extremely embarrassed Snape's mouth, and she left._

_Hermione gasped at the word that had brought tears to her eyes countless times before._

_Snape was dying inside. "POTTER! What are you doing in the headmaster's office?"_

_Harry looked fearfully startled. "I was just borrowing Dumbledore's pensieve for the moment."_

"_WHY IS _THAT_ MEMORY THERE?" Snape shouted, his face contorted with anger and embarrassment. Harry was speechless. He struggled to say something, but Severus continued. "Fifty points from Gryffindor! Where is the headmaster?"_

"_He's not here, and doesn't know we're here, professor," Hermione said, voice trembling and her eyes downcast._

"_Potter, you will serve detention with me tonight at eight o' clock. And you, Granger," he spat, eyes shining with hurt, "You will serve detention with me tomorrow at eight."_

_Harry looked horrified. "But Professor, you can't punish Hermione, I made her come—"_

"_Unless you used the imperious curse on her, she is just as guilty as you. I will see you at eight."_

_End Flashback_

She would be coming in just a few minutes. Severus was distraught. He had taken a sick day to avoid seeing her in class, even though he knew he would have to face her eventually. He would eventually have to come to terms with the fact that she had seen him in his most vulnerable and unappealing moment, calling the girl he had once loved that offensive name. He would have to deal with the truth that no one in their right mind would ever love _Snivellus_.

"Professor?" Hermione Granger poked her head uncertainly through the door to the potions classroom.

She had distracted Severus from his thoughts. _God, why did those eyes have to be so beautiful?_

"Come in, Miss Granger."

"What do you need me to do, Professor Snape?"

"Oh, just sit down. I'm sure you have a book you'd like to put to use."

Hermione sat down at one of the desks, but didn't touch the book she had brought with her. Instead, she watched Snape furtively.

Snape did not notice this. He had once again sunk deep into thought. He was thinking about how similar Lily and Hermione were, but also how different they were at the same time. They were both muggle-born, they were both very bright witches, both Gryffindors, both headstrong at times. But the similarities stopped there. Lily had been popular, very pretty. She had also been weak: she had fallen for Potter. She had hated Potter until their last year at Hogwarts, when her animosity had simply melted away. He hated James for that. He had loved her before James had, before she had reached the height of her popularity, yet it was James who had finally won her over in the end. Thankfully Hermione hadn't fallen for James' son. He didn't think he could have dealt with another Potter stealing another girl he loved.

But what was he saying? Neither of them was actually "his." This had been wishful thinking on his part. But Merlin, what he would give to be a little bit younger, and a little bit handsomer.

Hermione's voice once again tore him from his thoughts. "You loved her, didn't you?"

Snape reddened. "Excuse me?"

"Lily. Did you love her?"

"That is none of your business, Miss Granger," Snape said sharply. _Damn the girl for being so perceptive. How could she have seen that just from a few moments in the Pensieve?_

Hermione looked down embarrassedly. "I'm sorry professor."

Snape immediately regretted his cold behavior.

"If you must know," Hermione looked up expectantly. "I loved her a great deal." Snape's look soured. "But then she started going out with that git, James. It broke my heart." Snape noticed that she had opened up her book and began writing feverishly. He panicked.

"What are you doing?" he shouted. _She better not be writing that down. If she told that to anyone…_Snape quickly confiscated the book and flipped through the pages.

"No, Professor! Give that back!" Hermione looked mortified and tried to wrest it from his grasp. Snape held the book out of her reach as he began to read:

_Monday, November 3_

_I know I probably shouldn't feel this way, but I can't help it. I love him. He's just so…I can't describe him, really. Well, he's extremely intelligent for one._ Snape was intrigued. He desperately wanted to know who could have captured her heart, yet was deathly afraid, since he knew it couldn't possibly be him._ He's harsh and cold at first glance, and he's not very attractive. But he's different when he thinks no one's looking. He looks lost and sad, like he's missing something; it's like he's been missing something for so long that he's forgotten what it's like to be whole. Somehow his sadness became my sadness, and it won't go away. He's my missing piece. I only wish that I was Severus's missing piece._

He was stunned. _I must be imagining things._ But he read the line again, and it finally sunk in that it was _his_ name there. She loved him! He grinned broadly

Hermione had paled, and her breathing had quickened. She was panicking. She had even begun crying. She had taken his grin as a sign that he was inwardly laughing at her "silly teenage crush." It hurt.

Snape saw her crying and was immediately concerned. What was he supposed to do to make her stop crying? He put a comforting hand on her shoulder, and she cried harder.

"Why are you crying?" he asked her.

Hermione sobbed, "You must think I'm just a silly little girl with a crush on her teacher."

Snape's heart inwardly broke for her. He knew how it felt to be rejected. He only wanted her to be happy…but mostly he wanted her to be happy with him.

Not realizing what he was doing, he wiped a tear from her cheek, his finger lingering on her face. She clasped his forearm with both of her hands, and before he could stop himself, he kissed her. And what a glorious kiss it was. He drew her in close, and she melted into his embrace.

They were finally whole.

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**AN:** I hope that was a decent story. Please review and tell me how I could have improved it.


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